That year
I was too busy to celebrate
The winter solstice and on Christmas day
A friend talked me down
From cutting myself for the first time in five years
That day
I couldn't answer the phone right away
Throwing up trying to articulate
How I hated myself
Without saying that's an opinion that you should share
That year
I was too busy to celebrate
The anniversary of my new name
I let it become
One more rotting thing in my mouth that I can't say
That year
I graduated magnum cum laude
For the second time
I don't feel any way about it except
I did it I did it I did it
That year
Two of my friends almost passed away
I was too tired to even say
That I cared and
That I wanted them to stay
That year
I asked myself how do I celebrate
Not wanting to die for the past fourteen days
How do you make
A party out of something no one's aware of
That day
I asked myself how do I celebrate
Not opening a
Bottle of beer and drinking and drinking
On such an important day
That year
I think that I almost died that year
I was too tired to tell anyone
How do I know
The year's really over now?
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